Tight Circle … June 10, 2013

Cliques, a small exclusive group of people. You can be pseudo friends to these people individually, but when the group gathers, you … disappear.

Have you ever had a friend, someone at least that you thought a friend, who, when you are talking to them alone was as much a friend as friend could be, but when one of their “clique” friends approaches, that friend begins to talk to them exclusively? Sometimes they even close up together where you find yourself looking at your friend’s back. You check to see if perhaps you have become invisible, the fabric of which you are made having become transparent. You might as well have popped into another dimension where you could see them but they could not see you.

Cliques made up of exclusive friends, cliques which close you out. Impenetrable fortresses of individuals occurring in organizations of various types. No matter where you go unless you are part of a dominant clique your opportunities are diminished.  Some places you have to know one of these “beautiful” people to even get in the door. Usually, though, even if you manage to get in the door you find yourself still excluded, and opportunities you might have had as part of the clique, are denied. The “beautiful” people, as some have labeled them, have benefits beyond the isolated “lone wolf”, protecting them from being fired, laid off, or even reprimanded. They get the easiest positions, positions of little risk. They zoom past you, elevated to high positions despite the fact they lack the necessary qualifications, expecting you to make it work for them.

It’s not just business where these cliques of special people exist. It matters not where you go, you will find them.

Common threads align these beautiful people. They develop bonds amongst themselves, looking out for one another. If there is some advantage to be had, or some prize to distribute, some honor to bestow, they look at one another and not upon those who are outside the group, no matter how skilled or deserving someone else might be.

Ever been a part of a discussion group wherein you made a comment, a sensible pertinent comment, only to have the group stare at you in silence or mutter some incomprehensible remark, change the topic, ignoring the relevance of your offering? Then, later, one of the “beautiful” people make the same comment and a lively discussion ensues. I have. It’s most demeaning.

Your talents can be of the highest caliber, you could have attended the finest school, you might have the most stupendous of recommendations, but unless you are one of the “beautiful” people don’t hold your breath waiting for recognition.

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